The Anticipation of a Coming Generation

Yesterday was my sister-in-law's due date.

This means at any moment my brother will become a father. 

I am having some trouble wrapping my head around this. 

My brother, with the green eyes, the bald head and the fluctuating facial hair. 

My brother, who would steal my favorite teddy bear, run to the bathroom and hide it under the sink, but flush the toilet and tell me that the bear was floating down with the discarded toilet paper. 

My brother, who would randomly break into song, or even rarer,
into dance, in the kitchen as we fixed lunch.

My brother, who used to pick on my sister Charissa for not being a Yankee (born in IL himself) and will now make his jaw-shifting, eyes-slightly-narrowed, eyebrow-raised, dissatisfied "humph", face if you mention he was ever happy living anywhere above the Mason Dixon line.

My brother, who has been making eggs or oatmeal
 every morning for breakfast for years. 

My brother, whose car turnover rate was so extreme that in the first eight or so years of driving, he had eight or so cars. Not because he wrecked any, he normally improved them, he just got tired of them I suppose.

My brother, who has mastered the art of contented, contemplative
silence and one-word responses.

My brother, is so ferociously protective of his family that he gave each of his single sisters some form of mace/knife etc before we moved away from him, threatened my now brother-in-law with shooting him if he was not 'good to my sister',  and is  concerned that  the hospital his baby will be born in does not have metal detectors on the doors.

My brother, who signed up to coach wrestling at our high school,
with no real experience in the sport. 

My brother, who has grown from a college student, content with spending spare time driving trucks through mud and rocks, and buying new packs of socks rather than doing laundry, into a man who fights for every above average grade, on top of work and growing family concern.

My brother, who has the most ridiculous and understated sense of humor,
that you really have to know him to see. 

My brother, who used to practice "screaming" for the 'heavy metal' moments of the songs that his high school band would play (Kyris - maybe you'd heard of them).

My brother, who introduced to me the music of Brad Paisley
alongside the concept of having pride in where you live and where you are from
(excepting those two years up north).

My brother, who waited and prayed and fought for his wife, the amazing Pam, who so seamlessly fits into our family and with Andrew himself, that it couldn't be anything but God's plan.

My brother, with whom I can recall every serious conversation I've had.
And his calm, thoughtful expression and who's advice still echoes in situations I face today.

My brother, who, good decision or questionable one, has never once lost my respect or pride because he has always made it clear, that good or bad, his life and purpose comes back to a pursuit of God and at the end of the day that is what is important.

My brother, who within a matter of the days will become the one responsible for teaching
how to grow,
how to keep teasing friendly,
how to be confident enough to dance through the kitchen,
how to be strong enough to protect your family,
how to be weak enough to learn,
how to make eggs,
how to take pride in where you are from,
how to pursue what you love,
how buy a car,
how to listen and not overreact,
how to give anything your all,
and most importantly, how to pray and submit your life to God.

In the course of one conversation I had with my brother as I shared some of the struggles I had been facing at camp that summer he shared with me 2 Corinthians 12, a group of verses that had made a huge difference in his life.

"But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." - 2 Corinthians 12: 9-10

When I see my brother now I am exceedingly proud of him. I have sat behind him (I am seven years younger) and watched him grow and face life. I know there is plenty that I missed, plenty good and bad that I have not seen, but there is plenty that I have. And the most prevalent of that is my big, imposing, strong, protective brother's ability to be weak and to let Christ work though that weakness. In that conversation in a canoe on my, 18th birthday, he was weak enough to be even slightly transparent with his little sister (who he had not spent significant amounts of time with since I was about 11) see that he struggled and at the time, see that he submitted that to God.

I am human enough to know that my brother, no matter how awesome I think he is, is not perfect and I do not expect him to be, but I have seen, and continue to see, him step back and fight to submit his worry, his anger, his irritation, his heart, his relationships, and his self, to God. 

That is what makes me so proud of him. That is what makes me respect him so much. That is what makes me so excited for him to be a father.

My sister in law's due date was yesterday.

This means that at any moment my brother will become a father.

That child is freaking blessed. 

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